Mason Marc
Wednesday July 11th
I stopped taking my contraction medication when I hit 37 weeks. I remember wondering how I would know when ‘real’ labor would begin, since I was used to having frequent and consistent Braxton Hicks contractions. I continued my daily (or not so daily towards the end) walks, and tried other things I’d read about to get labor going. I was so sick of being pregnant at that point and figured I was far enough along to deliver a healthy baby. The Thursday morning the week before, I lost my mucus plug and as gross as it was, it was exciting! The next day I told Kim and she checked me, I was 1+ dilated and 80% effaced, 2 days shy of 37 weeks. In our Bradley classes, we’d heard so many birth stories where women had inconsistent contractions that started and went away for hours, some women’s water didn’t break until they were at the hospital and 8cm, some women’s water would break but contractions wouldn’t start on their own so they had to have Pitocin, and other seemingly “out of order” labor patterns. Tyler was shocked to find out it wasn’t like in the movies where 1. Water breaks. 2. Couple rushes to the hospital while woman pants through contractions 3. Woman pushes out baby once at the hospital. It was possible that this could be a 2 day process, and I was prepared for that. My plan was to labor at home until contractions were 5 minutes apart. I wanted to eat a good meal when I noticed ‘real labor’ coming on and I wanted to sit in our whirlpool tub at home to manage pain until time to head to the hospital. I packed a robe and slippers to walk the halls in during labor, to help bring on contractions. I packed a soothing piano CD to play in the birthing suite, brought massage oils and snacks. I wanted to be prepared for a long process because I had no idea if I’d have a fast labor like my mother’s, but I prayed I would.
After my check up with my midwife, I was so excited to hear that my body was getting ready, but remembered I’d heard stories of women who walked around at a 4+ for weeks before delivery. By Monday of birth week, I started noticing lower back pain, especially in the morning. I’d wake up with cramps in both front and back, but attributed them to the baby dropping and putting pressure on my pelvis and hips. I remember having a couple of contractions that I called “real” because they lasted a minute or two and felt strong in the middle, but I only had a couple at a time and didn’t notice anymore during the day. Wednesday was the same; I woke up with cramps, figured I just had to go to the bathroom, and went on with my day. I went to work at the gym around 3 and walked on the treadmill for about 10 minutes but got off to help someone. Around 5, it was slow, so I got on the treadmill to get another 10 minutes in. I walked for about 2 minutes when I felt a gush of warm fluid leave my body and run down my leg. Thankfully, I was wearing black running leggings and made it to the bathroom without anyone noticing. I sat on the toilet and lost even more fluid. This was NOT the subtle trickle some women experience. This was happening! My heart was racing and I called Tyler twice, who was doing yard work and couldn’t hear his phone, so I called my mom. Once I composed myself I closed the office and per Tyler’s request, I came home. On my drive home I called my midwife Kim and told her my water broke and yes, it was clear and I was feeling fine. I joked about having to cancel our dinner plans (Christy and AJ were coming over to grill) and Kim told me to meet her at the hospital in an hour, which would be 6:30pm. During my drive home I had a couple of contractions and knew that my labor was already progressing!
Now I know why they say to keep trash bags or towels in your car when you are close to your due date, I continued to lose amniotic fluid my whole drive home! When I arrived I found Tyler loading the car and asking how he could help. I told him I wanted to eat something first because I’d need energy to get through the labor but we were in hurry and nothing sounded good. He told me to take a shower and he’d load the car, so I got in the shower and realized that I was having contractions pretty close together. I would bend over and let the water hit my back while I breathed through them. I wasn’t counting to see how long or how close they were together, I figured it was still early since my labor had just started (or so I thought). Tyler came and got me about 15 minutes later and told me to hurry up. I remember he had to help me walk and dress. Kim told me to wear a diaper in my underwear because I’d continue to lose fluid.. so I did I had 2 contractions on the way to the car and noticed they were close together! On the car ride there I attempted to eat the peanut butter and honey sandwich Tyler had made me, but suddenly my mouth was dry and I was getting nauseous. We realized my contractions were about 3 minutes apart. We never took the tour at the hospital so when we parked we weren’t sure where to go. I remember having a contraction in the elevator and not being able to get off of our floor. Thank goodness for the handy capped handrail in there! I waddled to a vacant reception desk, bent over it and breathed through a contraction while Tyler searched for help. It seemed the hall was empty, which I appreciated because the hustle and bustle of hospitals freaks me out! Some lady led us to our room and said a labor and delivery nurse would be assigned to us. I had the presence of mind to ask if we could have one who supported natural childbirth and had experience with it. In walked a young nurse, younger than me I decided, and I was worried she would not know how to help me the way an old, wise doula would have. Her name was Amber and she couldn’t have been sweeter! She asked if I wanted an IV and I told her I was hoping to avoid IVs and all other interventions, so she agreed to allow me to keep myself hydrated with water and ice chips. I asked to not be offered medication and told her I was anxious to get in the tub. She led me into the bathroom to change into my gown and soon after I realized I had to throw up. I was so embarrassed to get sick in front of them, I usually lock myself in the bathroom when I get sick and refuse all help. I threw up 3 or 4 times in the bathroom and again in the bed, it was time to get over my “shyness” because things were going to get a lot messier! She then led me to bed to begin my EFM and that felt like the longest 20 minutes of my life! Lying still in the bed through contractions was one reason I didn’t want to have any IVs in the first place, I wanted to be able to move around. Once that was over, she got me a birthing ball and I had a few contractions while sitting on that and clinging to Tyler’s neck, or leaning over the edge of the bed while he rubbed my back. This is when the pain of the contractions went from a 6 or 7 to an 8 or 9. I don’t remember very much from this point on but Tyler has a good memory, so he’s helping me fill in the blanks. The pain just kind of took over and I focused on one contraction at a time. I breathed, relaxed my mind and tried not to think about anything at all. I do remember that Tyler was getting antsy and kept asking where Kim was. It was almost 7:30 at that point and we had been at the hospital for almost an hour. I don’t think she realized how “in labor” I was when called and is probably used to first time moms having a slower labor process. When she walked in the door I was so relieved. I thought “OK, this can happen now. Kim’s here”. I told her I wanted to get in the tub and she said she’d check me first. I originally asked to not be told of my progress because I didn’t want it to effect my morale in a negative way, but when she told me I was 6 cm dilated and 100% effaced I was shocked! She told me I could get in the tub, which she usually saves for the hardest part of labor, and I was so excited about it. Tyler sat by my side and Amber and Kim sat on the bathroom floor under the counter. I remember asking at one point, “Are you guys super bored? I’m sorry”. I listened to them talk about their days, and landscaping projects. At one point I was in enough pain that I said “SHHHH!” and they began to whisper. Tyler asked when it would be time for me to get out and be checked again, or how we would know when it was time to push. All Kim said was “I’m looking for some things in specific, I’ll know when she’s ready”. I labored in the tub until 9pm. That hour and a half seemed like 30 minutes to me. Something about the rhythm of the jets and the warm water helped sooth me and took the edge off. Kim kept saying to breathe “down” and push the baby down. Abdominal breathing is key and for some reason that visual really helped me.
I had been dreading transition, because I understood that to be the most difficult part of labor. It is the part when women start doubting themselves and want to stop, quit and go home. You also lose your modesty and no longer care about what you do or what people see. It is the most painful part but luckily the shortest and I knew that it would only last about 20 minutes. I waited for it to get so bad that I would recognize it, and I think it helped me handle the pain to think “it’s going to get worse. This isn’t it yet”. All of the sudden I got so annoyed with the towel over my chest, I flung it off of me. As I breathed out I made some kind of trembling sound resembling a goat or sheep (still no screaming) and I felt my body do the involuntary expulsive pushing with the contractions. We studied in class that that was transition and what happens when the baby is in position and you are ready to push! As soon as Kim heard that sound and saw me lunge into the contractions and push a little she said, “Ok time to get out. It’s time to push”. I couldn’t believe I had gone through transition. I thought “THAT was what I was so afraid of, what I’d been dreading?” So far I was sailing through the labor and was having an ideal experience.
They dried me off and helped me into the birthing bed. I was specific about wanting to be free to try different positions to push in. I was certain I’d want to squat or be on my side or even get off the bed and be on all fours on the ground- anything but being reclined in the bed with my feet up. That’s the funny thing about labor and birth. You don’t know what you want until its happening. I was surprised how calmly Kim got situated and said, “You can start pushing whenever you want. When you feel a contraction, take a deep breath and push down and out.” I let one contraction come and go and then felt ready. I tried pushing in a way that felt natural and asked if I was doing it right. Contractions generally slow down when it’s time to push to give your body a break between them. With my first couple of pushes, Kim said she thought he’d be here by 10:00 (it was probably 9:15ish at the time) and I thought that was totally doable. I pushed with each contraction for about half an hour and started to get tired and ask why he wasn’t here yet. She offered to help me into other positions to push and so I got up on my knees and faced turned around so I was chest to the elevated part of the bed. I tried a couple of pushes like that but felt I used too much energy holding myself up, so I got back onto my back. I could feel that my left hip needed to be raised off the bed (I was very in tune with my body at this point) so my nurse held me up off the bed slightly and I grabbed the back of my thighs with each push. It was exhausting. I didn’t hurt the way I expected it to; actually it was sort of automatic. The hard part was once Kim discovered Mason was stuck and instructed me to do “double pushes” which was a big push, quick breath and another big push without letting up. I did that for an hour. I never wished I’d had pain relief, never wanted an intervention, I just wanted a nap. I remember looking up at Tyler and saying “I want to be done now.” Then Kim told me what I needed to hear to gather up the strength to keep going. She told me with a smile, “You’re already doing it! You are the only one who can finish now. I’m here to catch him but I can’t go in and get him. It’s up to you.” It was so empowering.
I had made it clear that I didn’t want an episiotomy and that I was really afraid of tearing. Kim encouraged me to push hard to move Mason forward but also let me know when to take it easy to keep my perineum intact. As I pushed she stretched me, pulling pretty hard and telling me to “push over the pain”. It gave me an area to focus on and the coaching helped. Between pushes she applied a warm washcloth to the area and it felt good. I was also really paranoid about.. ummm…releasing stool.. while pushing, and a few times I noticed someone politely dabbing my bottom but I never “went” and no one made a big deal about it. More so than the pain of natural childbirth.. those were my two biggest hang ups!
At one point she thought he might be “sunny side up”, and this was the only time I got concerned. I’ve heard other birth stories where that lead to c-sections and I wanted to avoid that at all cost. She asked if all my contractions felt equally strong and I told her some would come and not feel “worth it” to push, so I let them roll by and give myself a break. I loved being in control of the progress! I originally asked to just push at my own pass and not have anyone count to 10 but when she offered I thought it would help me have a goal and push longer than I thought I could. It helped! Because I refused a monitor, they just checked my belly every once in a while to check Mason’s heartbeat and he as handling the stress of labor just fine.
Up until 11pm Tyler, Kim and my nurse Amber were the only other people in the room. Then she paged someone and told Tyler to get the camera. She told me Mason was about to crown and asked me to tell her where it burned the most when I pushed. She was going to help stretch me to minimize tearing (something that would have been hard to do if I’d had the water birth I originally desired). All of the sudden, the door opened and 4 or 5 new people came in wearing surgical gear and rolled in medical trays and a big spot light. Kim put on her cap and mask and I was surrounded! I didn’t expect that, it kind of freaked us out! I joked later that it felt like a set change in a live theatrical production, they swept in for one scene and cleared out as fast as they’d come.
The “ring of fire” is an appropriate name for what crowing feels like but the good news is, it doesn’t last long! We spend way more time being afraid of it then it’s worth. It hurt, but I knew he was finally coming out so I just breathed and pushed when encouraged to. I don’t know how many pushes it took but I requested to see it in a mirror and they showed me and let me touch his head. This would have grossed me out a year ago but in that moment, it was amazing! It especially burned on my inner left labia and I told her that so she helped stretch it as Mason’s head emerged. Tyler said it was scary to see is pointy little purple head but not see the rest of him for a few minutes. I don’t remember feeling anything after his head was out, it all just went numb (so worrying about the shoulders was a waste of time All of the sudden, he was out and placed on my chest. The medical crew swept around, I lost the rest of my amniotic fluid, a lot of blood.. and whatever else was in there. I asked that his cord remain intact until it stopped pulsing so that the most blood could be returned to his body, and a couple of minutes later it stopped and Tyler cut the cord. I don’t even think I took in the moment, I was just concerned with skin to skin and breastfeeding. He stayed attached to my right breast for 40 minutes while everyone else buzzed around us. I got a shot of pitocin (I think? Didn’t ask for it..) to help expel my placenta. That happened right away. The worst part was when Kim pushed on my abdomen hard enough to push it down. Then a few pushes delivered it. I asked to see it and she explained both sides to me. I close my eyes during Grey’s Anatomy but this was amazing. They pushed on my stomach every few minutes to expel clots. I had 3 stitches to my inner left side, but I didn’t tear up or down and was so thankful for that! Mason was born at 11:11pm on July 11th. He scored all 9s and 10s on his APGAR test (10s are rarely given so we were happy to hear he got them!) Suddenly all of the pelvic rocks, kegels, and other birth prep exercises I did, my workouts I forced myself to do the past 9 months and the diet I stuck to were all worth it because he was perfect. I didn’t sleep that night; I just stared at my baby and floated on the clouds of endorphins and love. The cocktail of hormones that’s delivered to your brain and body after a natural birth is incredible. I didn’t sleep until the following night and refused to let Mason leave my sight.
The recovery the first 3 days was rough, it was hard to get around and was more painful than I’d expected. I was afraid to take pain killers because I didn’t want it in my breast milk so I refused the vicodin they offered. Baths were recommended every few hours. Sitting in the water was the only time I felt weightless but it was so hard to stand up out of the tub. I remember the first time I looked down in the water.. I told Tyler it looked like two twinkies side by side! I was terrified to see myself so swollen and the pressure was unlike anything I’d ever felt, rightfully so. I say it felt like someone put bricks in my perineum and then sewed it up. It took about a week to be able to walk and sit without discomfort and pain relievers.
I had a beautiful natural birth experience. I trusted my body, not medicine to bring my baby into this world and feel so blessed that we didn’t require any medical intervention. We are so glad we took the Bradley Classes and learned the husband coached childbirth methods. Having Tyler by my side encouraging me and reassuring me was exactly what I needed. Even though he was prepared to help with my relaxation, choose positions and cope with a long labor or pain, it turns out all I need was to hear him say, “You are doing amazing. He’s almost here!” It is by far my proudest accomplishment and something that no one could have done for me. It was the perfect ending to an easy pregnancy and a wonderful beginning to motherhood.
I stopped taking my contraction medication when I hit 37 weeks. I remember wondering how I would know when ‘real’ labor would begin, since I was used to having frequent and consistent Braxton Hicks contractions. I continued my daily (or not so daily towards the end) walks, and tried other things I’d read about to get labor going. I was so sick of being pregnant at that point and figured I was far enough along to deliver a healthy baby. The Thursday morning the week before, I lost my mucus plug and as gross as it was, it was exciting! The next day I told Kim and she checked me, I was 1+ dilated and 80% effaced, 2 days shy of 37 weeks. In our Bradley classes, we’d heard so many birth stories where women had inconsistent contractions that started and went away for hours, some women’s water didn’t break until they were at the hospital and 8cm, some women’s water would break but contractions wouldn’t start on their own so they had to have Pitocin, and other seemingly “out of order” labor patterns. Tyler was shocked to find out it wasn’t like in the movies where 1. Water breaks. 2. Couple rushes to the hospital while woman pants through contractions 3. Woman pushes out baby once at the hospital. It was possible that this could be a 2 day process, and I was prepared for that. My plan was to labor at home until contractions were 5 minutes apart. I wanted to eat a good meal when I noticed ‘real labor’ coming on and I wanted to sit in our whirlpool tub at home to manage pain until time to head to the hospital. I packed a robe and slippers to walk the halls in during labor, to help bring on contractions. I packed a soothing piano CD to play in the birthing suite, brought massage oils and snacks. I wanted to be prepared for a long process because I had no idea if I’d have a fast labor like my mother’s, but I prayed I would.
After my check up with my midwife, I was so excited to hear that my body was getting ready, but remembered I’d heard stories of women who walked around at a 4+ for weeks before delivery. By Monday of birth week, I started noticing lower back pain, especially in the morning. I’d wake up with cramps in both front and back, but attributed them to the baby dropping and putting pressure on my pelvis and hips. I remember having a couple of contractions that I called “real” because they lasted a minute or two and felt strong in the middle, but I only had a couple at a time and didn’t notice anymore during the day. Wednesday was the same; I woke up with cramps, figured I just had to go to the bathroom, and went on with my day. I went to work at the gym around 3 and walked on the treadmill for about 10 minutes but got off to help someone. Around 5, it was slow, so I got on the treadmill to get another 10 minutes in. I walked for about 2 minutes when I felt a gush of warm fluid leave my body and run down my leg. Thankfully, I was wearing black running leggings and made it to the bathroom without anyone noticing. I sat on the toilet and lost even more fluid. This was NOT the subtle trickle some women experience. This was happening! My heart was racing and I called Tyler twice, who was doing yard work and couldn’t hear his phone, so I called my mom. Once I composed myself I closed the office and per Tyler’s request, I came home. On my drive home I called my midwife Kim and told her my water broke and yes, it was clear and I was feeling fine. I joked about having to cancel our dinner plans (Christy and AJ were coming over to grill) and Kim told me to meet her at the hospital in an hour, which would be 6:30pm. During my drive home I had a couple of contractions and knew that my labor was already progressing!
Now I know why they say to keep trash bags or towels in your car when you are close to your due date, I continued to lose amniotic fluid my whole drive home! When I arrived I found Tyler loading the car and asking how he could help. I told him I wanted to eat something first because I’d need energy to get through the labor but we were in hurry and nothing sounded good. He told me to take a shower and he’d load the car, so I got in the shower and realized that I was having contractions pretty close together. I would bend over and let the water hit my back while I breathed through them. I wasn’t counting to see how long or how close they were together, I figured it was still early since my labor had just started (or so I thought). Tyler came and got me about 15 minutes later and told me to hurry up. I remember he had to help me walk and dress. Kim told me to wear a diaper in my underwear because I’d continue to lose fluid.. so I did I had 2 contractions on the way to the car and noticed they were close together! On the car ride there I attempted to eat the peanut butter and honey sandwich Tyler had made me, but suddenly my mouth was dry and I was getting nauseous. We realized my contractions were about 3 minutes apart. We never took the tour at the hospital so when we parked we weren’t sure where to go. I remember having a contraction in the elevator and not being able to get off of our floor. Thank goodness for the handy capped handrail in there! I waddled to a vacant reception desk, bent over it and breathed through a contraction while Tyler searched for help. It seemed the hall was empty, which I appreciated because the hustle and bustle of hospitals freaks me out! Some lady led us to our room and said a labor and delivery nurse would be assigned to us. I had the presence of mind to ask if we could have one who supported natural childbirth and had experience with it. In walked a young nurse, younger than me I decided, and I was worried she would not know how to help me the way an old, wise doula would have. Her name was Amber and she couldn’t have been sweeter! She asked if I wanted an IV and I told her I was hoping to avoid IVs and all other interventions, so she agreed to allow me to keep myself hydrated with water and ice chips. I asked to not be offered medication and told her I was anxious to get in the tub. She led me into the bathroom to change into my gown and soon after I realized I had to throw up. I was so embarrassed to get sick in front of them, I usually lock myself in the bathroom when I get sick and refuse all help. I threw up 3 or 4 times in the bathroom and again in the bed, it was time to get over my “shyness” because things were going to get a lot messier! She then led me to bed to begin my EFM and that felt like the longest 20 minutes of my life! Lying still in the bed through contractions was one reason I didn’t want to have any IVs in the first place, I wanted to be able to move around. Once that was over, she got me a birthing ball and I had a few contractions while sitting on that and clinging to Tyler’s neck, or leaning over the edge of the bed while he rubbed my back. This is when the pain of the contractions went from a 6 or 7 to an 8 or 9. I don’t remember very much from this point on but Tyler has a good memory, so he’s helping me fill in the blanks. The pain just kind of took over and I focused on one contraction at a time. I breathed, relaxed my mind and tried not to think about anything at all. I do remember that Tyler was getting antsy and kept asking where Kim was. It was almost 7:30 at that point and we had been at the hospital for almost an hour. I don’t think she realized how “in labor” I was when called and is probably used to first time moms having a slower labor process. When she walked in the door I was so relieved. I thought “OK, this can happen now. Kim’s here”. I told her I wanted to get in the tub and she said she’d check me first. I originally asked to not be told of my progress because I didn’t want it to effect my morale in a negative way, but when she told me I was 6 cm dilated and 100% effaced I was shocked! She told me I could get in the tub, which she usually saves for the hardest part of labor, and I was so excited about it. Tyler sat by my side and Amber and Kim sat on the bathroom floor under the counter. I remember asking at one point, “Are you guys super bored? I’m sorry”. I listened to them talk about their days, and landscaping projects. At one point I was in enough pain that I said “SHHHH!” and they began to whisper. Tyler asked when it would be time for me to get out and be checked again, or how we would know when it was time to push. All Kim said was “I’m looking for some things in specific, I’ll know when she’s ready”. I labored in the tub until 9pm. That hour and a half seemed like 30 minutes to me. Something about the rhythm of the jets and the warm water helped sooth me and took the edge off. Kim kept saying to breathe “down” and push the baby down. Abdominal breathing is key and for some reason that visual really helped me.
I had been dreading transition, because I understood that to be the most difficult part of labor. It is the part when women start doubting themselves and want to stop, quit and go home. You also lose your modesty and no longer care about what you do or what people see. It is the most painful part but luckily the shortest and I knew that it would only last about 20 minutes. I waited for it to get so bad that I would recognize it, and I think it helped me handle the pain to think “it’s going to get worse. This isn’t it yet”. All of the sudden I got so annoyed with the towel over my chest, I flung it off of me. As I breathed out I made some kind of trembling sound resembling a goat or sheep (still no screaming) and I felt my body do the involuntary expulsive pushing with the contractions. We studied in class that that was transition and what happens when the baby is in position and you are ready to push! As soon as Kim heard that sound and saw me lunge into the contractions and push a little she said, “Ok time to get out. It’s time to push”. I couldn’t believe I had gone through transition. I thought “THAT was what I was so afraid of, what I’d been dreading?” So far I was sailing through the labor and was having an ideal experience.
They dried me off and helped me into the birthing bed. I was specific about wanting to be free to try different positions to push in. I was certain I’d want to squat or be on my side or even get off the bed and be on all fours on the ground- anything but being reclined in the bed with my feet up. That’s the funny thing about labor and birth. You don’t know what you want until its happening. I was surprised how calmly Kim got situated and said, “You can start pushing whenever you want. When you feel a contraction, take a deep breath and push down and out.” I let one contraction come and go and then felt ready. I tried pushing in a way that felt natural and asked if I was doing it right. Contractions generally slow down when it’s time to push to give your body a break between them. With my first couple of pushes, Kim said she thought he’d be here by 10:00 (it was probably 9:15ish at the time) and I thought that was totally doable. I pushed with each contraction for about half an hour and started to get tired and ask why he wasn’t here yet. She offered to help me into other positions to push and so I got up on my knees and faced turned around so I was chest to the elevated part of the bed. I tried a couple of pushes like that but felt I used too much energy holding myself up, so I got back onto my back. I could feel that my left hip needed to be raised off the bed (I was very in tune with my body at this point) so my nurse held me up off the bed slightly and I grabbed the back of my thighs with each push. It was exhausting. I didn’t hurt the way I expected it to; actually it was sort of automatic. The hard part was once Kim discovered Mason was stuck and instructed me to do “double pushes” which was a big push, quick breath and another big push without letting up. I did that for an hour. I never wished I’d had pain relief, never wanted an intervention, I just wanted a nap. I remember looking up at Tyler and saying “I want to be done now.” Then Kim told me what I needed to hear to gather up the strength to keep going. She told me with a smile, “You’re already doing it! You are the only one who can finish now. I’m here to catch him but I can’t go in and get him. It’s up to you.” It was so empowering.
I had made it clear that I didn’t want an episiotomy and that I was really afraid of tearing. Kim encouraged me to push hard to move Mason forward but also let me know when to take it easy to keep my perineum intact. As I pushed she stretched me, pulling pretty hard and telling me to “push over the pain”. It gave me an area to focus on and the coaching helped. Between pushes she applied a warm washcloth to the area and it felt good. I was also really paranoid about.. ummm…releasing stool.. while pushing, and a few times I noticed someone politely dabbing my bottom but I never “went” and no one made a big deal about it. More so than the pain of natural childbirth.. those were my two biggest hang ups!
At one point she thought he might be “sunny side up”, and this was the only time I got concerned. I’ve heard other birth stories where that lead to c-sections and I wanted to avoid that at all cost. She asked if all my contractions felt equally strong and I told her some would come and not feel “worth it” to push, so I let them roll by and give myself a break. I loved being in control of the progress! I originally asked to just push at my own pass and not have anyone count to 10 but when she offered I thought it would help me have a goal and push longer than I thought I could. It helped! Because I refused a monitor, they just checked my belly every once in a while to check Mason’s heartbeat and he as handling the stress of labor just fine.
Up until 11pm Tyler, Kim and my nurse Amber were the only other people in the room. Then she paged someone and told Tyler to get the camera. She told me Mason was about to crown and asked me to tell her where it burned the most when I pushed. She was going to help stretch me to minimize tearing (something that would have been hard to do if I’d had the water birth I originally desired). All of the sudden, the door opened and 4 or 5 new people came in wearing surgical gear and rolled in medical trays and a big spot light. Kim put on her cap and mask and I was surrounded! I didn’t expect that, it kind of freaked us out! I joked later that it felt like a set change in a live theatrical production, they swept in for one scene and cleared out as fast as they’d come.
The “ring of fire” is an appropriate name for what crowing feels like but the good news is, it doesn’t last long! We spend way more time being afraid of it then it’s worth. It hurt, but I knew he was finally coming out so I just breathed and pushed when encouraged to. I don’t know how many pushes it took but I requested to see it in a mirror and they showed me and let me touch his head. This would have grossed me out a year ago but in that moment, it was amazing! It especially burned on my inner left labia and I told her that so she helped stretch it as Mason’s head emerged. Tyler said it was scary to see is pointy little purple head but not see the rest of him for a few minutes. I don’t remember feeling anything after his head was out, it all just went numb (so worrying about the shoulders was a waste of time All of the sudden, he was out and placed on my chest. The medical crew swept around, I lost the rest of my amniotic fluid, a lot of blood.. and whatever else was in there. I asked that his cord remain intact until it stopped pulsing so that the most blood could be returned to his body, and a couple of minutes later it stopped and Tyler cut the cord. I don’t even think I took in the moment, I was just concerned with skin to skin and breastfeeding. He stayed attached to my right breast for 40 minutes while everyone else buzzed around us. I got a shot of pitocin (I think? Didn’t ask for it..) to help expel my placenta. That happened right away. The worst part was when Kim pushed on my abdomen hard enough to push it down. Then a few pushes delivered it. I asked to see it and she explained both sides to me. I close my eyes during Grey’s Anatomy but this was amazing. They pushed on my stomach every few minutes to expel clots. I had 3 stitches to my inner left side, but I didn’t tear up or down and was so thankful for that! Mason was born at 11:11pm on July 11th. He scored all 9s and 10s on his APGAR test (10s are rarely given so we were happy to hear he got them!) Suddenly all of the pelvic rocks, kegels, and other birth prep exercises I did, my workouts I forced myself to do the past 9 months and the diet I stuck to were all worth it because he was perfect. I didn’t sleep that night; I just stared at my baby and floated on the clouds of endorphins and love. The cocktail of hormones that’s delivered to your brain and body after a natural birth is incredible. I didn’t sleep until the following night and refused to let Mason leave my sight.
The recovery the first 3 days was rough, it was hard to get around and was more painful than I’d expected. I was afraid to take pain killers because I didn’t want it in my breast milk so I refused the vicodin they offered. Baths were recommended every few hours. Sitting in the water was the only time I felt weightless but it was so hard to stand up out of the tub. I remember the first time I looked down in the water.. I told Tyler it looked like two twinkies side by side! I was terrified to see myself so swollen and the pressure was unlike anything I’d ever felt, rightfully so. I say it felt like someone put bricks in my perineum and then sewed it up. It took about a week to be able to walk and sit without discomfort and pain relievers.
I had a beautiful natural birth experience. I trusted my body, not medicine to bring my baby into this world and feel so blessed that we didn’t require any medical intervention. We are so glad we took the Bradley Classes and learned the husband coached childbirth methods. Having Tyler by my side encouraging me and reassuring me was exactly what I needed. Even though he was prepared to help with my relaxation, choose positions and cope with a long labor or pain, it turns out all I need was to hear him say, “You are doing amazing. He’s almost here!” It is by far my proudest accomplishment and something that no one could have done for me. It was the perfect ending to an easy pregnancy and a wonderful beginning to motherhood.