Brinkley Ray
When I was pregnant with my second daughter, I was convinced that I would never reach my due date. My first daughter was a week early; I figured I would probably go even earlier with this second one. Silly me.
38 weeks came and went, and I practically counted the hours. I was at such odds with myself - teaching each week and emphasizing to our couples that the baby will come when the baby is good and ready, and then being so anxious for our little girl to come.
I had a lot of contractions - I mean, a LOT. Weeks in advance, hours at a time, she was so low and I was so uncomfortable and she still wasn't coming. Eventually, I completely stopped paying attention to my contractions. I just knew that I was going to be pregnant forever.
Sunday, November 23, 2008, at about 4:00 in the afternoon I started having contractions. They were about 7 to 8 minutes apart and I ignored them - they were no different than the last month of contractions that I had had. By 5:00 I thought that maybe they were picking up in intensity, but still, I tried not to focus on them. Around 5:30 I could definitely feel them in my back. I knew that they were stronger than the other contractions that I had had, but didn't want to get my hopes up. I stalled on telling Paul about them until close to 6:00.
I had Bible study at 6:30 and decided that I wanted to go. I figured that if I was really in labor, I still had hours to go, so I might as well head to Bible study and try to get my mind off it. I did tell Paul about the contractions before I left, and after a good talk we decided that since we were meeting just a few blocks from our house it would be okay to try going.
Once I settled in at Bible study the contractions started getting closer until they were about every 5 minutes. I tried to keep my mind off of them, but continued sitting in a chair and was noticeably uncomfortable during contractions.
Luckily, we wrapped up a bit earlier than normal and I headed home. Something changed rather noticeably on the short drive and when I arrived home I couldn't get comfortable. I tried laboring in the side lying position, and I tried getting comfortable with lots of pillows. I was restless. I kept getting up and going to the bathroom. I kept wringing my hands and was cold and hot at the same time.
My daughter (then 2 ½) knew what was happening. She kept asking if the baby was coming and if I needed help with relaxation. =)
I yelled for Paul to call the midwife. I couldn't reconcile the things that were happening. I knew that what I was feeling and describing seemed like late first stage, even into transition, but I hadn't really been laboring for long at all.
When I got the midwife on the phone, she just listened while I talked. It seemed like she was trying to let me make the decision on whether or not it was time to go in. I couldn't decide what to do. I finally said, I just don't know - I can't get comfortable and I keep going to the bathroom, and I'm hot and I'm cold - and I think I might throw up. That was all it took. She recognized right away how far along I was and completely changed her tune. She said we needed to leave right away.
We packed the car and headed for Paul's sister's house to drop off Talia and then headed to the hospital.
We arrived in the emergency room to check-in at 9:00 and headed up to triage. We were there for only a couple of minutes, long enough for them to check me (7 ½ cm) and ask a few questions. They didn't even do an initial strip on the external monitor. Our midwife asked if I could walk to our room. I figured this would only help move things along, so I agreed; it was a long walk. Every few feet I had to stop and brace myself along the wall. I was having so many contractions, and I was bleeding a lot.
Once we arrived in the room the midwife held the external monitor on me for a full contraction to check the baby. A few minutes later I had the urge to push. She checked me again, and I was fully dilated. Things were happening so fast, and I hadn't had enough time to really settle myself and find out what position I was most comfortable in. When I felt the urge to push, I felt lost because I didn't have a position yet. Paul and the midwife kept asking how I wanted to push, and I literally didn't know. I ended up pushing in the same position as I did with my first daughter (hands and knees), because it was what I was familiar with.
I pushed 3 times, and at 9:29 p.m. Brinkley Ray was born! Paul was able to catch her - which was a really neat experience for him. I was so exhausted. I remember not even reaching for her right away, but instead collapsing on the bed. Paul brought her to me, and we cuddled and nursed. Her cord stopped pulsating right away, so Paul cut it. I immediately wanted Talia to be with us. Paul called his sister, and she brought her in. The four of us took the hour to get familiar with each other before the rest of our families joined us.
My labor with Brinkley was short but very intense. I feel like I have a greater appreciation for the different kind of labors that women experience. It was a whirlwind - but is a great story, and she did end up coming one day before her due date.
38 weeks came and went, and I practically counted the hours. I was at such odds with myself - teaching each week and emphasizing to our couples that the baby will come when the baby is good and ready, and then being so anxious for our little girl to come.
I had a lot of contractions - I mean, a LOT. Weeks in advance, hours at a time, she was so low and I was so uncomfortable and she still wasn't coming. Eventually, I completely stopped paying attention to my contractions. I just knew that I was going to be pregnant forever.
Sunday, November 23, 2008, at about 4:00 in the afternoon I started having contractions. They were about 7 to 8 minutes apart and I ignored them - they were no different than the last month of contractions that I had had. By 5:00 I thought that maybe they were picking up in intensity, but still, I tried not to focus on them. Around 5:30 I could definitely feel them in my back. I knew that they were stronger than the other contractions that I had had, but didn't want to get my hopes up. I stalled on telling Paul about them until close to 6:00.
I had Bible study at 6:30 and decided that I wanted to go. I figured that if I was really in labor, I still had hours to go, so I might as well head to Bible study and try to get my mind off it. I did tell Paul about the contractions before I left, and after a good talk we decided that since we were meeting just a few blocks from our house it would be okay to try going.
Once I settled in at Bible study the contractions started getting closer until they were about every 5 minutes. I tried to keep my mind off of them, but continued sitting in a chair and was noticeably uncomfortable during contractions.
Luckily, we wrapped up a bit earlier than normal and I headed home. Something changed rather noticeably on the short drive and when I arrived home I couldn't get comfortable. I tried laboring in the side lying position, and I tried getting comfortable with lots of pillows. I was restless. I kept getting up and going to the bathroom. I kept wringing my hands and was cold and hot at the same time.
My daughter (then 2 ½) knew what was happening. She kept asking if the baby was coming and if I needed help with relaxation. =)
I yelled for Paul to call the midwife. I couldn't reconcile the things that were happening. I knew that what I was feeling and describing seemed like late first stage, even into transition, but I hadn't really been laboring for long at all.
When I got the midwife on the phone, she just listened while I talked. It seemed like she was trying to let me make the decision on whether or not it was time to go in. I couldn't decide what to do. I finally said, I just don't know - I can't get comfortable and I keep going to the bathroom, and I'm hot and I'm cold - and I think I might throw up. That was all it took. She recognized right away how far along I was and completely changed her tune. She said we needed to leave right away.
We packed the car and headed for Paul's sister's house to drop off Talia and then headed to the hospital.
We arrived in the emergency room to check-in at 9:00 and headed up to triage. We were there for only a couple of minutes, long enough for them to check me (7 ½ cm) and ask a few questions. They didn't even do an initial strip on the external monitor. Our midwife asked if I could walk to our room. I figured this would only help move things along, so I agreed; it was a long walk. Every few feet I had to stop and brace myself along the wall. I was having so many contractions, and I was bleeding a lot.
Once we arrived in the room the midwife held the external monitor on me for a full contraction to check the baby. A few minutes later I had the urge to push. She checked me again, and I was fully dilated. Things were happening so fast, and I hadn't had enough time to really settle myself and find out what position I was most comfortable in. When I felt the urge to push, I felt lost because I didn't have a position yet. Paul and the midwife kept asking how I wanted to push, and I literally didn't know. I ended up pushing in the same position as I did with my first daughter (hands and knees), because it was what I was familiar with.
I pushed 3 times, and at 9:29 p.m. Brinkley Ray was born! Paul was able to catch her - which was a really neat experience for him. I was so exhausted. I remember not even reaching for her right away, but instead collapsing on the bed. Paul brought her to me, and we cuddled and nursed. Her cord stopped pulsating right away, so Paul cut it. I immediately wanted Talia to be with us. Paul called his sister, and she brought her in. The four of us took the hour to get familiar with each other before the rest of our families joined us.
My labor with Brinkley was short but very intense. I feel like I have a greater appreciation for the different kind of labors that women experience. It was a whirlwind - but is a great story, and she did end up coming one day before her due date.
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Brinkley Ray November 23, 2008 8 pounds, 2 ounces 21 inches "However much we know about birth in general, we know nothing about a particular birth. We must let it unfold, with its own uniqueness." ~Elizabeth Stavoe Harm |
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